flashback: letter to my (former) employer the day I was laid off... 9/30/2009

With all that we're going through right now financially, sometimes it's hard to think about "the big picture"... why we made some of the decisions we made, for instance, about me not going to find another job and staying home with the kids... There have been a few times in the last couple years that I've gone back and read this letter I wrote on September 30th, 2009, after finding out that I was going to be laid off from my big fat corporate job,

The fact is, we knew we might go through what we're going through now. The attitude then was that it won't kill us, and that if we stay determined, we can build the life we want instead of being voluntarily enslaved to a corporation because of the pay and benefits... so hard to break free from, even though you may be miserable, the pay and benefits are SOOO good.

Anyway, without further ado, I give you my goodbye letter to Avaya. I hope it inspires you.

hiking at Fort Mountain State Park, north GA, August 2009

I sent this to the organization I worked in for 9 years as well as friends and colleagues in Sales and Services today as today is my off payroll date. I AM FREE!! YAY! 

hello everyone: 

well, herein lies my goodbye to Avaya. i am quite verbose and known for running my mouth, and i don't plan to stop here. it's been a long 9 years, people! (forgive the lack of caps... sort of a rebellion... hee hee!) i also attached a pic of me and my kids, doing what we love best... enjoy :) 

i just want to share with you all a little bit about my history here, who i was when i started, and who i am as i depart. and say goodbye, of course! 

when my mother (marcia smith from georgia telco/georgia's own credit union - some remember her from the peachtree corners branch) frantically called me to tell me about the job opportunity at the local Lucent Customer Care Center that she'd heard about from montyce scott, i remember wondering if i could even do a job "like that". i swore up and down that i would NEVER work anywhere that required me to sit in front of a computer all day and talk on the phone. those of you that know me call me something like "throwback" or "flower child"... well, yeah, i am kinda like that, and yeah i really thought i would be satisfied cleaning toilets and waiting tables for a living if that was what made me happy. at that time, that is literally what i was doing. actually, i had quit my job waiting tables on new year's eve of 1999, so i could go to a party and not have to go in to work the next day. pretty lame. the next job i had was cleaning houses, and i was on toilet duty. yep. oh, and one more thing... i was 20 years old and pregnant with my son. let's just say the future did not look too bright for me at that time in my life. i had made a series of reckless choices and was bearing the full weight of those consequences... a very good thing to experience and motivate one to change. 

i was always a very good student, with an excellent GPA in grade school. i even attended a grammar school in england (had to test to get in) and was one of their top students. so passing that test was not too hard. and the phone interview... passed that too. i got the job. $10.81 an hour... union guaranteed raises (thank you CWA). and full benefits after 6 months. sounded like a pretty cushy job ... the hook, line and sinker of corporate america. 

i was assigned to marilyn duurham's team in government solutions as a collector. i still remember my customers' names and the wonderful people on that team... kyle westbrook, akyiel staley, marilyn jackson were all in my corner and some of the most wonderful friends. alison williams gave me the crib i used for my son. chandra herring and rosita rosier (god rest her soul) were like mamas to me. it was a safe and good place to grow and learn. 

when Avaya spun off from Lucent, i was just heading out on a one year maternity leave. i returned to lots of changes, but still the same wonderful team who helped me learn the ropes again. i was also going through an extremely difficult time in my life... and i remember most about that time that my team and my wonderful coach marilyn were there for me. this was all just after 9/11 and soon, everything tanked. i found myself unemployed with a layoff in july of 2002. thankfully, and because of what marilyn duurham saw in me, i was brought back in december of that same year. at that point i was determined that i would not be satisfied to remain a rep... that i wanted to grow and go into management. and that is exactly what i did... and i never looked back... well, maybe once or twice :) 

i have basically been a jack of all trades at Avaya. my resume is packed full of experience and things i've accomplished for this company... not much of it flows from one area to another area with much fluidity. from operations assistant to process manager to training manager to .... what??? AR/escalation person? ahem... go figure... but i know i worked hard no matter what area i was in. i thought i had the "in" on the cush job with the cush benefits and thought maybe i should make this a career! after all i was working with some of the most tremendous people who INSPIRED me and were INVESTING in me... paulette carter (the BEST - it's because of her that i was given the opportunities to grow... she pulled all the best out of me... i love her and RESPECT her... she saw my outspoken-ness and used it to the fullest), traci bahsoon (the best coach who understood the importance of investing in her people... she really pushed me to be EXCELLENT, i miss her), gail moran (the refiner's fire... and mama bear... she is to me one of the most respectable women i have ever worked with)... 

as a result, there was a time when i was afraid to lose my job. the reality is i have no college education, but FEAR provoked me to rack up too many dollars in student loans to attend university of phoenix to try to get a degree in business administration, so that if i lost my job, i wouldn't have to worry about getting another job making the same amount of money... HOW RIDICULOUS!! i was making decisions motivated by fear to keep a job that i never really thought i would be happy doing in the first place!! ("did she just say that?") it was at that point that i started daydreaming about all the things i WISH i had done different when i was 20 and waiting tables and cleaning toilets... and so it begins... 

what began was the road to freedom from the mentality that i must rely on a large corporation to provide for me... both meet my needs monetarily and meet my family's health care needs... freedom from the thought that i do not possess within myself the ability to generate income on my own, with my own brain, with my own hands, with my own free spirit... the ability to learn, create, diversify... i began dreaming of the day that i would have the guts to walk away from doing the 9 to 5 (or rather, 8 to 7 ... lol) and take a risk to do something i loved, that filled up my soul. ... freedom from the thought that struggling is BAD and pain is avoidable in growth... what a falsehood. i know by my faith that it's the fire that purifies, that glorifies... that makes us beautiful and pure and STRONG. i looked forward to the day that i had the strength to walk away from corporate america into that fire and make a life. but i was hooked, SUNK by the "package" and financial constraints prevented me from finding the strength to do what i really wanted to do. so someone else made the decision for me. :) 

so here i am. in the fire. thank you, Avaya restructuring people for giving me the OPPORTUNITY to be free to choose, free to plan, free to be creative and free to be motivated and free to learn and practice and grow and make money using my two hands and to feel the pain and the struggle and to go through the fire. i have to say that i didn't have the guts to do it on my own (and take hold of that freedom that was there all along). but you set me free, Avaya, and i am SO GRATEFUL! i am dead serious!! thank you!! 

i am grateful to God for providing for me through Avaya for these 9 years. my employment at Avaya literally marked a true season or chapter in my life where i needed to be able to be self sufficient, independent, able to provide for myself and my child in every way until i got to a safe place in life... i am now married to my best friend, and have a lovely home and garden, and two precious children (Dakota is almost 9! and Shiloh, 13 months), a cat, a dog, and a beautiful life... kinda like Maslow's hierarcy of basic needs... i am at a place of self-actualization now, people, and it is the right time for this chapter to be closing. 

this company has changed a lot. and that is really an understatement. i don't understand what the powers above are doing but i guess they know. my heart goes out to those of you that are left to feel the fire and the pinch here within the company. but the truth that applies to me is also the truth that applies to you... hopefully the fire that Avaya is in right now will truly yield a better and stronger company for all and not just lots of money for a few. in the meantime i will watch from the sidelines and pray! i wish i could send y'all some fireproof suits! 

so... what do i want to say in closing... hmmm... well, i guess i should use this final Avaya email to tell you what i will be doing and how i plan to do it... i have already started not one but TWO businesses. those of you in the Atlanta area with a sweet tooth, check out my website - i am making cakes/cupcakes to order from scratch and they are FANCY! in fact my business is called fancy pants (goodies galore). the other is photography called snap! photography... my websites are below... i would really appreciate your support! 

i really do wish you all the best. i will miss the people i've worked with the most. you all are wonderful people and i know you work really hard. hang in there and please... let's not let the relationships we've built dissipate. it's important to stay in touch. after all, the people are really what matter most here. 

so, in the words of ISRAEL & NEW BREED... "it's a new season! it's a new day! fresh anointing... coming my way!! it's the spirit of power and prosperity!! it's a new season coming to me!!" 

PEACE! love y'all! 
brooke hammel :)